Valentine’s Day: It’s About Managing Expectations

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okay, we can all pretty much acknowledge that nowadays valentine’s is basically a hyped up love-triangle between candy companies, greeting cards makers and the media. that being said, who doesn’t love chocolates and getting a sweet card that covers your fingers and eyebrows in glitter (oh, is that just me)? my biggest qualm with the holiday is that your love for one another shouldn’t just be celebrated on this day and your anniversary. it should be happening consistently throughout the year. men-if you surprise your lady with chocolate out of the blue-i can personally attest that it will mean a heck of a lot more and could lead to a chocolatey make out session (results not guaranteed).

i’m sorry i don’t have a sexier picture of me with chocolate on my teeth. side note: if we are ever hanging out and i’m eating chocolate, there is a 100% chance that i will do this to you and find my self utterly hilarious.



let’s make a list of why valentine’s day is a ‘SUPER SWEET’ holiday:

grow oldwith you

-it typically involves eating chocolate or some sort of candy and who doesn’t love a good sugar rush
-people in relationships get to be all gushy and lovey to each other and blame it on the holiday
-you can send flowers to your crush, say it’s from a ‘secret admirer’ and it’s cute-not stalker-y
-there is a greater chance of you and your special someone ‘sealin’ the deal’ *wink wink

now why valentine’s day is a ‘SUPER SUCKY’ holiday:

-expression of love shouldn’t be an obligatory act
-i know when i’ve been single on this day…it’s more annoying than…well…people essentially rubbing it all over that  they have someone to chocolatey make out with
-it’s a stinkin’ huge money maker for..well…everyone. according to the Latin Times article, 224 million roses are grown for this day, 151 million cards are exchanged and $1.6 BILLION will be spent on candy
-more often than not, someone is expecting something whether it’s chocolate, a proposal or flowers and is let down

regardless of how you feel about this day, let’s manage expectations, shall we? if you want flowers and a box of chocolates, then tell your lover that! oh, you wanted him to get you those things without you having to say anything?!? recipe for failure because people can’t read minds (unless you’re Severus Snape). are you not really that into this holiday? say that too and have your partner save a few bucks.

it’s so important to be communicating, even when it comes to whether or not you want dark chocolate or roses (ps. my husband knows that i never ever want roses so he gets me other kinds of flowers). i have also expressed to my husband that love notes mean a lot to me and i enjoy receiving those therefore he knows that it would make me happy if he wrote me a love note.

likewise, i know he does not like trinkets and would prefer ‘experiences’ so for birthdays and other holidays, i know not to get him something tangible but surprise him with an adventure. both of us feel way more satisfied because you put out there what you want, hopefully your partner listened and now you both feel ultra satisfied in the realm of giving and receiving.

with that, i decided to buy flowers for both of us to enjoy and some mini oreos for my husband because we always joke about eating them like cereal-which will probably happen later today.


the new wifestyle: it’s important to communicate your wants and expectations-doing this will make you both feel closer and more successful.

1) what else do you love/hate about valentine’s day?
2) perfect gift if you had to receive one on valentine’s day?
3) are a fan of milk/dark/white chocolate? or are you one of those people who isn’t really into chocolate (i’ve heard rumors about a few people like this)

ps. if you are looking for some last minute date/gift ideas-stay tuned for the next post!


  1. Victor

    February 12, 2014 at 1:48 pm

    1) what else do you love/hate about valentine’s day?
    Too commercial — I rather give love everyday instead of just once per year.

    2) perfect gift if you had to receive one on valentine’s day?
    I am with Ravery: an experience: a movie, a concert, a walk in the park, a hike in the woods.

    3) are a fan of milk/dark/white chocolate?
    Dark chocolate, with nuts if possible (hazelnuts are best); chocolate covered coffee beans are out of this world! 🙂

    • chelsea

      February 13, 2014 at 12:19 pm

      yes indeed-giving love every day is way more important, i agree Victor! ohhh how about dark chocolate hazelnuts with chocolate covered coffee beans and hike in the woods?! hope you’re having a great day!

  2. Nick

    February 12, 2014 at 2:03 pm

    1) Everything about it.
    2) For it to magically be the next day.
    3) Depends on where its from, who makes it and what else I’m eating/drinking. Some chocolatiers I prefer there straight chocolates, others I prefer filled. A good dark always makes me happy with wine or coffee, white can just be super smooth. Milk is a gamble for me tbh, I eat it happily, but if there is a good dark or white available I often tend towards them first. But milk still tends to be the day to day chocolate. Sadly in the US my chocolate consumption has plummeted.

    • chelsea

      February 13, 2014 at 12:29 pm

      ohhhh my goodness Nick-best ‘valentine’s gift idea’ ever! i now also want it to be magical the next day!!!!! it also sounds like you are quite the chocolate connoisseur and now i want to go on a chocolate wine/coffee pairing with you and heather 🙂 does the US lack delicious chocolate compared to australia? we have some awesome local ones in portland!

      • Nick

        February 13, 2014 at 2:47 pm

        heathers the best to comment on the differences between the US and Aus chocolate as I on the whole stopped eating it bar little after dinner mints. (What can I say, I love Creme de Menthe)

        An old semi birthday thing I did with a friend as our birthdays were near each other was we’d take the day off work, spend the morning hitting about 3 different chocolate stores buying a large selection of chocolates, then head home, eat chocolate while drinking a bottle of absinthe. Its amazing the hangover that much alcohol with that little ‘real’ food gives.

        Sadly, my favorite chocolate store back home changed owners then closed down so my selection of good european creams is now alot less, so until I find a new place (I have one I suspect is run by one of the previous staff members but have yet to visit) I’ve been sticking with some local stuff ( Some very tasty floral creams they have (rose and violet)

      • Heather Hawkins

        February 14, 2014 at 7:01 am

        US chocolate=cardboard in comparison to Australian chocolate=food of the Gods!