Being Bold and Time to Yourself

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i have decided my word of the year is “BOLD.” it scares me a little bit to say it out loud but this year i am going to expand my comfort zone, do things that my normal, anxiety-ridden brain freaks out about and be bold…so watch out!

relationship blog be bold

the first step in my boldness is announcing that i am going to write a book (cue my brain to immediately start coming up with all the reasons why i shouldn’t). if you like the facebook page, i asked about what aspects of relationship or marriage might interest folks so thanks to those that gave suggestions. i completely understand that i will be writing about what speaks to me, what speaks to my heart and what i know but i think it’s also valid to get a sense of what people want or need to read about relationships or the early years of marriage. so…give me your 2 sense (see what i did there)!

i have had the last few days to enjoy our new apartment completely to myself! the husband is venturing to a few cities before i meet up with him in Lubbock, TX on thursday for some more workshops. here is what my friday night consisted of:

relationship blog date with selfi also watched waaaay too many episodes of ‘Parenthood’ on hulu. it’s been really nice to have a few days all to myself because i haven’t had a chunk of alone time in SIX MONTHS. not gonna lie…that first night, i totally forgot how to be alone. it was too quiet, no one was singing me songs about what we would have for dinner (and i bet it would have been a stellar one considering what i was eating/drinking) and i just felt lonely.

i went from being someone who looooved my alone, quiet time to being with my husband 24/7 while the tour was going on. then i come into all this time and i have no idea what to do with myself so naturally i called my parents and had them talk to me for a while. it didn’t help that there was a bad storm over the weekend with crazy intense wind and rain so it also sounded like someone was attempting to break in through my windows (isn’t that what you think of too?) i was the queen of alone time and now i was sitting on the couch twiddling my thumbs.

then it got better because i got to see some friends (me, Kim and Grace pictured below) over the weekend and sit in front of castle and cows and drink wine. yay!

relationship blog friend datei also started thinking about how lucky i am to be married to a man i miss when he’s away. i don’t just miss that he will get up to get me hot cocoa so i don’t have to, or take out the trash or make me dinner but i am always reminded that i just have more fun when he’s around.

don’t get me wrong-i think it’s super important to take time away from each other just as a reminder that you are indeed each your own person but it’s a pretty great feeling to realize how a person adds so much to your life and it’s often very easy to take that for granted when you get used to it. distance makes the heart grow fonder blah blah blaaah. it’s kinda true but don’t get too crazy, distance.

don’t worry about him though…he’s just saving dogs lives and looking cute. read about his adventures of puppy rescue and how he gets a little crazy about dog hair on him HERE.

Ryan-Avery-washing-a-dogso for now i will get my own hot cocoa and make up my own songs about random things and make BOLD moves. happy tuesday!

the new wifestyle: don’t be afraid of spending time with yourself because you are pretty badass and capable of big, bold things. 

1) what do you think wives and newly married couples need to hear?
2) when your significant other is away, what is something you miss most about them?
3) what is your word of the year (if you don’t have one yet…make it up and tell me!)


  1. Heather Hawkins

    January 14, 2014 at 11:45 am

    1) When it comes to couples, 1 + 1 still equals 2. If you try to equal just one, you end up with someone being upset. But if you can successfully be a yin and yang, life will be easier. If you feel the same things, do the same things, ARE the same thing all the time, there is no one to pick you up when you are down because you are both on the floor. So Nick and I, when we are having a hard time, we take turns doing the falling down and picking up.
    2) He smells good and he’s very warm. I always run cold. So I go snuggle up to him and steal some of his warmth.
    3) Soft. I am made up of lots of hard edges. You can bend without breaking, you can float without falling. Its all a matter of being softer.

    • chelsea

      January 15, 2014 at 4:27 pm

      ohhh Heather i really like that “we take turns falling down and picking up” that spoke to me A LOT. thank you for sharing that. mmm that familiar scent is certainly something to be missed when it’s gone (says the wife who is currently sitting in my husband’s t-shirt that i may have sprayed his cologne on).

      your word ‘soft’ is unique-so true about needing to bend without breaking and being softer allows that!

  2. junebugroseanne

    January 15, 2014 at 12:46 pm

    When Bob was in the Army Reserves, every year I spent 2 whole weeks by myself when Bob went on his annual active duty thing (plus 1 weekend per month). I am kind of quiet anyway, so I loved my time to my self. I would go to the mall for hours after work, and come home and watch “anything I wanted” on TV. Sometimes, I would go watch my favorite movie at a theater. If I had it to do all over again, I would have started taking music lessons WAY sooner, because there’s about 30 years, there, that I could have spent learning something instead of frittering it away on TV. But, anyway, everything has it’s time.

    • chelsea

      January 15, 2014 at 4:33 pm

      thanks June for your comment! i found myself getting in that ‘yay i can watch whatever i want on tv’ mode on friday and had to get a handle on myself because i know that feeling of spending a lot of time in front of the TV. so happy to hear that you did find your way to music lessons but it is a good reminder to be conscious of the time we spend and how we spend it! glad you don’t have to spend 2 weeks apart and 1 weekend per month apart anymore!

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