Not that Girl Who Dreamed of Weddings and Marriage

By  |  4 Comments

where were we? oh yeah…i don’t panic when this guy basically says “i’m not looking for a girlfriend but a wife, want to date?

we survive the 7 months apart with the use of webcams, emails and him writing me a letter every single day while he was working in DC for the summer and once a week while abroad. i have an amazing mother who gave me airline miles for my christmas present so i could visit ravery in the czech republic for thanksgiving!

i miss that orange puffy coat something fierce even if “it makes you look like a crazy american in europe!

ryan and chelsea avery praguei fly out and meet his parents in texas after he gets back from prague (eek! i was so nervous) thankfully they were/are incredibly kind and fun people! we even all went on an alaskan cruise together in june and still like each other!

his mom asked what kind of meat i like and he told her ham. she made me an entire ham. ravery hates ham.

young ryan and chelsea with inlaws

my boyfriend and i go from being 5,000 miles apart to spending 17 hours on a road trip from texas to colorado. we grow even closer as well as find out more of those annoying nuances about one another (he sings the wrong words to songs and i eat the last of the snacks).

a few days after we arrive back in colorful colorado, we are having a fondue night with our friends and ravery says his stomach hurts so he can’t do the dishes. we give him an incredibly hard time.

2 hours later we are in the emergency room and he has to undergo emergency surgery to have his appendix removed. he lists me as his “emergency contact” and that’s the moment we both knew we were pretty serious.

marriage blog relationship advicehis mother sends me a box of chocolates and candied apples to say ‘thank you for taking care of my baby. the only reason i didn’t fly down was because i knew he was in good hands!’ i like her more and more. this occurs in january 2008, about 7 months after we start dating. we were going into our second semester of our junior year of college.

we continue laying many things out on the table. i told him that if we have kids, i can’t handle vomit. at all. i will run away. he understands and agrees to deal with it. we talk about our dreams and our future together. we both love traveling and we both wear chacos. must be love.

in april 2008, we walk by a jewelry store. he suggests we go in just to look at things ‘for fun.’ we make our way to the engagement ring section (shocking, i know).

i point to one that i really like and my stomach gets butterflies in thinking that one day we might actually just get married.

we leave and i mention that i think it’s absolutely appropriate for women to pick out their own rings since we are the ones wearing it forever. we start talking a little bit more seriously about spending forever together but i told him i didn’t like the idea of dating less than a year before we get engaged so he must wait to ask me until at least the middle of may.

let me also just say that i was never really one of those little girls who dreamed of her wedding day and fantasized about her perfect partner. my mother always told me not to get married before 30 (somewhat joking but mostly seriously) and i sort of figured that’s what would happen because girl has stuff to do jeeeez.

woman with ring

then this guy enters my life and suddenly i’m all like “i want a princess cut diamond and a big white dress!” what was he doing to me?!

as the month of may approaches, i feel myself being hyperaware of activities we are doing that could be ‘setting the stage’ for a proposal. i nonchalantly start to mention that if he did decide to propose to me, i wouldn’t want a big scene or to be the center of attention or for him to feel like he needs to go all out. he acknowledges this and smirks a little. i feel nervous.

little do i know what he has in store for the middle of july, which consisted of not letting me wash my hair, potato burritos and convincing me to let him drive my brand new car while i’m blindfolded…

stay tuned for the engagement story on monday because hot dang…it still blows my mind and makes me laugh and long for burritos stuff with potatoes.

1) what was it like meeting your in-laws for the first time?
2) were you obsessed with weddings and marriage growing up?
3) how old were you when you got married and was it close to what age you thought you would?
4) did you help pick out your ring or did your spouse select it?


  1. Kristi

    August 22, 2014 at 8:21 am

    Not married, but a good friend from college is getting married tonight.

    Your story is so sweet.

    • chelsea

      August 24, 2014 at 6:36 am

      hope you had some fun at the wedding kristi! thanks for reading our story…it made me surprisingly happy to relive the moments and memories 🙂

  2. Pingback: Fish Sucked on Our Toes in Malaysia (Adventure Day in Kuala Lumpur) | the new wifestyle

  3. Pingback: Promises to My Husband on Our 4th Anniversary | the new wifestyle