Why Your Husband is Better Than Mine
why you should be content in your marriage
now before you think i’m a terrible wife who doesn’t love and appreciate her husband because i said “your husband is better than mine,” let’s first acknowledge that i truly believe i married the best person on earth…for me.
he utterly spoiled me with massive amounts of surprises for my birthday last week (like scheming with my mom to get her out here and fiery cupcakes), he is patient and tries his best to understand my struggles with anxiety. sometimes i even come home to perfect little pockets of happiness that make me feel like everything in the world is where it should be.
i feel incredibly lucky that we have found each other and incredibly grateful that we both choose to make our relationship our top priority.
it’s my intent with sharing in this space to empower people that good and healthy relationships do exist, but you have to invest in them.
i also share the tougher times we’ve experienced (like changing dreams) because we don’t have a perfect relationship either. we are two individuals choosing to spend life together and that is a complex thing.
when i wrote a post about how to stop feeling jealous in your relationship, many people commented that they often compare their relationships to others and it makes them jealous. i’ve been there before too.
here’s where the title of the article comes in… YOUR husband is better simply because he’s YOUR husband (and not mine, obviously. unless you think we’d be good sister wives). i am not in any way putting my husband down or saying he’s not good enough because he is the perfect partner for me. in fact, he’s the freaking best and he’s my best.
i was talking with someone who said something along the lines of “wow, you’re so lucky your husband did all those surprises for your birthday. i wish mine would do things like that.” i can’t argue too much with the first part because i am so lucky that my husband is the most thoughtful man on earth, but i know her husband does other things to show his appreciation for her.
i’ve been guilty of this but here’s a reminder for us all:
this even goes for “friends” on the internet because of course we are going to mainly post the positive, spectacular things on instagram and facebook. i don’t know about you but i don’t feel like taking a selfie in the middle of an argument with my husband and posting it. #angryface
my point is that we need to stop comparing ourselves/our partners/our relationships to others because we have something great right in front of us.
your husband is great because you picked him. he meets the qualities you are looking for in a partner and sure, when we see surprises of hot air balloon rides for anniversaries, maybe a small part of us wishes our partners would do that (ravery, i don’t actually want that).
if that is really is something you want, then express that but don’t compare yourself to others because we never see their full relationship.
you picked your partner for many reasons and because we are human, of course there are things we wish we could change about them.
if there are things that you wish your partner would do, then let them know. i talk about this in my e-book, but no one is a mind reader (don’t let those info-mercials tell you otherwise either because i’ve called those numbers and it’s a bunch of bologna).
my husband didn’t used to be a huge card giver on birthdays/anniversaries/holidays but that is something i really look forward to and is important to me. i told him how they often mean more to me than the gifts and i would appreciate receiving them and BOOM, now he gets me cards.
he doesn’t love tangible gifts and asked me to put the money towards getting him an experience. i wouldn’t have known this if he didn’t tell me.
no relationship or person is perfect, that’s the joy of experiencing all life has to offer.
believe that your spouse is better than mine (or anyone’s) because i believe mine trumps everyone else’s too. be confident in the person you picked to be your partner because your husband/partner/wife really is the best…and so is mine.