What to Do when You Want to Quit

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what do you do when you want to quit?

easy answer: don’t.

deeper answer: think about your deeper why

here’s the thing about motivation, we unfortunately cannot sit around and wait for it to hit us and then take action. we have to take action first, and then hopefully motivation will creep in and help keep the distractions at bay. we have to start, even when we don’t feel like it.

this has been happening to me lately. i am the queen of working on a million other little tasks instead of focusing on the one thing that i know will advance my goal.

this has resulted in me procrastinating a lot.

so here’s what we do when we think about quitting (or doing everything else but what we know we need to be working on):

think back to why you started and set the goal in the first place!

there is power in pen to paper so literally write out why you started whatever goal you’re going after. whether it’s a new product launch, working out regularly, choosing healthier food options, working on a speech, having more patience with your toddler, write down your why.

why did you create that goal in the first place?

chances are you initially set that goal with the intent to improve one or more elements of your life. what i’ve found that is working for me is digging deeper at my true ‘why.’

real life examples:

goal: workout 3 times a week for at least 30 minutes each
why: so i can get healthier
deeper why: so i can live longer, feel better in my body, have more energy and keep my anxiety in check

goal: spend at least one hour a day working on my TEDxTalk
why: so i can do a stellar job on stage
deeper why: so that i/we can show other married couples what happens when we start communicating our true desires – it’s transformative and fulfilling!

goal: create an extremely successful product launch
why: because i’ve worked hard on MarriageMoon (ohhh teaser alert) and want it to be successful
deeper why: to prove to myself that i am capable, smart and can bring value to the world. in exchange for the value i add to the world, people’s marriages will improve and i will be able to put the money earned from this product into a lifestyle that will help my daughter flourish 

if you are struggling with follow through on the goals you’ve set or the new year’s resolutions created, dig deeper on your why and start – even if you don’t really feel like it.

remember, half-assing gets half the results (if you’re lucky)

inspirational quote


i’d love to know an exciting (even if scary) goal you are currently working on!


  1. Leanna Lindquist

    March 14, 2018 at 9:36 am

    My goal is to write a cozy mystery and complete the first draft this year. I am taking an online writing class. Next week I am attending a conference where I will meet others like me and published authors in my genre. I am in a local writing group that meets twice a month. My daughter is my writing coach and editor. She created business cards for me to share at the conference. She also created a blog site for me that is about to go live. I will chronicle my journey about being a 60+ who decides she should write a book. I have written 4 chapters. Best thing about this is I love it and people say it feels “cozy.”

    • chelsea

      March 27, 2018 at 12:46 pm

      yay leanna!!!! i cannot wait to read it! ‘a cozy mystery’ novel sounds right up my alley! really proud of you for making it happen. hope the conference was fantastic and you made lots of great connections! share the blog site when it goes live – i want to follow along. i am so happy for you!

  2. Audrey

    March 14, 2018 at 12:48 pm

    LOVE this. I think it’s tough to know when to walk away and when to push through and think back to the original why. Honestly, I don’t think I have any big goals right now. At least not on my own, lol. I’d like to write a book, open a dog/farm sanctuary, etc. but I’m not really working toward any of that… Maybe I should fix that.

    • chelsea

      March 27, 2018 at 12:45 pm

      you’re right – it is hard to get to the bottom of your real WHY you might want to quit and sometimes we should quit and for good reasons!

      sounds like you DO have some big goals – i want to buy/read your book and visit your dog/farm sanctuary so get on it 🙂

  3. Vivien

    March 14, 2018 at 7:18 pm

    Thank you for this wonderful reminder!

    I have a couple of “new” goals that took me by surprise of sorts this year. One of them I can’t talk about just yet, it’s still in its infancy but hopefully soon!

    The other one is I am a coach for a local TEDx and I got paired up with a fabulous speaker! I have had many moments in this short span of time (so far) where I felt frustrated. Where I wanted to throw up my hands and ask why on Earth am I doing this, because I don’t feel I have anything new to offer her. But thank you for reminding me it’s diddly squat about ME, it’s all about HER and making sure I do everything in my power to help her rock her TEDx talk! She seems to be excited for this pairing, and other people (who know the two of us) say we are a good yin-yang pairing. So…I might trust their judgement 🙂

    • chelsea

      March 27, 2018 at 12:43 pm

      ohhhh exciting vivien about your new goals!!! sending you all the good vibes and can’t wait to hear about it!

      so amazing that you are coaching a TEDx speaker – they are lucky to have you! i really love that you are now owning that you are both helping each other! trust their judgement for sure!

  4. Charlene Maugeri

    March 27, 2018 at 1:56 pm

    Oh I love this. It’s so true! Digging deeper into your why can make all the difference. Also, I’m excited for MarriageMoon (whatever that is)! It sounds exciting!!!