Strive For Adding Value, Not Being Perfect!

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we have been having a truly incredible time in australia! i am bursting with stories, insights, lessons learned and amazing photos of what we’ve been experiencing these past few days!

we flew into perth, australia last week and over the past 5 days we have been in kalgoorlie, australia, a gold mining town that’s a six hour drive from perth! more on the historic, risque and unique town of kalgoorlie (pronounced cal-goo-lee) soon.

my husband and i are were invited to speak at the district 17 toastmasters conference here and while i’ll get into that more in a future post (spoiler alert- one of the best conferences we’ve ever been to) this was the first time we were able to give an hour keynote together!

ryan and chelsea avery dream bigwith a mix of lingering jet lag and probably nerves, my body woke up the morning of our workshop at 3:30am. the tossing and turning continued and by 4:30am i decided to get up and do something more productive. since we are in a hotel room, i couldn’t exactly flip on the TV or work at the desk so i found the next best spot as to not disrupt my slumbering husband…the gorgeous bathtub (or as they call it here ‘the spa’):chelsea avery the new wifestyle bathtub

here is where i sat to run through our presentation and also where i had a few moments of panic that the town ghosts would think it hilarious to mysteriously turn on the faucet but that didn’t happen (thank goodness). the topic of our speech was around communication within your personal relationships, professional relationships and most importantly how you communicate with yourself.

as you may know, i struggle with anxiety and of course public speaking falls in that category for me too. i also feel extra pressure when i speak since i’m married to a world champion…and i also coached him. eeeeeek the perceived pressure is a lot at times because i’m afraid of disappointing people or not being as ‘good’ as they expect me to be.

as i was hyping myself up mentally, fearing that i’d forget my lines or just flat out pass out on stage, i realized that as long as one person walked away with even the tiniest nugget that could make his or her day a little better, i would be happy.

moments before we walked on stage together, we agreed that we both wanted to be there to add value and be less concerned about delivering the content perfectly. i realized i want to be the type of speaker and more importantly the type of person that isn’t perfect but delivers value rather than be perfect and be empty. strive for adding value, not being perfect!

chelsea avery and ryan avery australiai am proud to say i feel like we did that!


i shared this photo on instagram where my virtual friend melinda gave me a present when i arrived in australia. we connected over facebook and this here blog and now we have become in-person AND virtual friends!

capable the new wifestyle bracelet

my word of the year is capable and that is what the awesome bracelet she gave me says!

as silly as it may seem, making the decision to wear this the day of our speech gave me the extra confidence i needed. it was something tangible to look at and feel. i first had to remind myself why this was my word in the first place. i chose this word as a reminder because i am capable of much more than i often believe of myself (and you are too). thank you melinda!capable the new wifestyle

i know for a fact i did not deliver my parts of the presentation perfectly but that became significantly less important to me as our hour passed. as time moved along, i could feel myself speaking with greater authenticity and sharing what i know and as well as what i don’t know.

i did my best that day, nothing more and nothing less. i’m happy to report that we even had people let us know about the impact our strategies had for their own relationships and communication! that felt good to get confirmation that we are on the right path together.

i am writing this for you and just as much for myself to serve as a reminder that we are capable of more than we often expect of ourselves. we need to believe deeply (and sometimes uncomfortably) that we are capable of so much more! let’s agree to stop striving for ‘perfect’ but rather add value.

where is an area you can add value to the people in your life?

ps. i’m coming at you from the close of monday in australia. the future looks good so make the most of your day!



  1. Elyse

    June 1, 2015 at 7:50 am

    Gah! I love this! All of this. I too have anxiety about not being/seeming perfect to others, and I’m going to post this everywhere in my house as a visual reminder!
    Elyse recently posted…Highs and Lows of May

    • chelsea

      June 2, 2015 at 4:46 pm

      great idea to post it all over your house to serve a visual reminder elyse! i should do that too when i get home…it’s amazing how different you feel when you remember that!

  2. Brittany

    June 1, 2015 at 8:16 am

    Congrats! I know public speaking is always difficult!
    Brittany recently posted…How to Shake A Bad Mood + Grateful Heart

    • chelsea

      June 2, 2015 at 4:49 pm

      thanks brittany 🙂

  3. Kay Watson

    June 1, 2015 at 10:48 am

    Yesterday’s webinar was exactly what I needed. Love your bracelet. Source? Thanks for all your inspiration.

    • Melinda

      June 1, 2015 at 6:53 pm

      They’re from Momentum, Designs That Move You. 🙂

      • chelsea

        June 2, 2015 at 4:55 pm

        thanks melinda for the reference! i couldn’t find the card it came on in my 3 suitcase options…ha!

    • chelsea

      June 2, 2015 at 4:50 pm

      so happy you were able to attend, kay! you are fantastic! looks like melinda has you covered with where the bracelet is from 🙂

  4. Ashley @ Saving Money in your Twenties

    June 1, 2015 at 10:51 am

    YOU ARE AMAZING!!! Congrats on the successful presentation 🙂 I love your idea of wanting just one person to get one little thing out of the presentation and focusing on that! BTW the second pic of ryan during the speech looks like he’s beatboxing… I really hope that’s what was actually going on 🙂
    Ashley @ Saving Money in your Twenties recently posted…I really am addicted to the DIY Haircut…

    • chelsea

      June 2, 2015 at 4:52 pm

      thanks ashley!! and you totally called it, ravery was absolutely beat boxing and he nailed it haha i wish. i think at that point he was imitating the airlines canceling his flight 🙂 hope you are doing well!

  5. Bill Burns

    June 1, 2015 at 4:49 pm

    You say it so well Chelsea! Perfect is what you want when buying a new Ferrari or Bentley. In speaking authenticity and adding value IS WHAT IT IS ALL ABOUT.

    Very proud that you got up there on stage!!

    If you are half as good speaking as you are a coach, you are awesome!

    • chelsea

      June 2, 2015 at 4:54 pm

      thanks so much bill 🙂 i like your comparison to perfection for buying a new car but authenticity in speaking is where it’s at! appreciate you reading and for your encouragement!

  6. Joyce Feustel

    June 1, 2015 at 6:15 pm

    Terrific post, Chelsea. I really admire you stepping into your own as a speaker and co-presenting with Ryan. What a treat for the audience! Yes, I need to remind myself every day that the important thing in life is to add value in whatever I do. There’s a saying I have always liked since I first heard it: Progress, not perfection… On a personal note, since Bruce and I spent 2 weeks in Australia last year, I loved hearing about your experiences there no matter what you are doing. We were primarily in New South Wales, visiting my brother and his wife on their dairy farm. But we did get to Canberra, Sydney and Brisbane too.
    Joyce Feustel recently posted…An “Ask the LinkedIn Trainer” Session

    • chelsea

      June 2, 2015 at 4:55 pm

      thanks joyce for your kind words! we had a lot of fun doing it together so i think we may be on to something 🙂 how fantastic that you got to spend two weeks in australia last year! we are absolutely loving it here! we are hitting perth, cottesloe and kalgoorlie so we will have to come back to check out the cities you visited!

  7. Melinda

    June 1, 2015 at 7:08 pm

    Hey Chelsea, you and Ryan were GREAT together! You are incredibly capable, inspirational and authentic.
    Melinda recently posted…7 Public Speaking Myths and Bad Advice – Part 1

    • chelsea

      June 2, 2015 at 4:56 pm

      thanks so much melinda for giving me that extra boost and always being a smiling, nodding face in the audience!

  8. Paula Howley

    June 1, 2015 at 8:16 pm

    SUCH a good post. So important. I’m a perfectionist so I really struggle with this in ALL aspects of my life. Work, parenting, marriage, you name it.
    I’m applying for a big keynote for a huge women’s conference in Vancouver this fall and although I’m psyched about it, I find myself freaking out, comparing myself already to all those perfect, rich Vancouver women. ACK!!!! I need to remember that I have something of VALUE to share and THAT’S what matters. Period.
    Wicked post lady.

    • chelsea

      June 2, 2015 at 4:57 pm

      hooooooray paula!!!! go you, you vocal woman!!!! love that you are applying for a big keynote for the women’s conference in Vancouver! you are fantastic and will be perfect for that! you have so much value to add that they will be lucky to have you!

  9. Amanda Wood

    June 2, 2015 at 5:31 pm

    I am so incredibly proud of you! You are so brave and strong to face that public speaking anxiety and stomp it into the ground. Proving to yourself that you CAN do this! You are CAPABLE!
    Amanda Wood recently posted…7 Things I Do That My Husband Thinks Are Weird

    • chelsea

      June 3, 2015 at 5:56 pm

      awww thanks amanda! i really appreciate you saying that and it is fun to prove to yourself you are capable 🙂

  10. Charlene Maugeri

    June 6, 2015 at 1:20 pm

    Oh I love the idea of bringing value and not perfection. I also love the word capable for the word of the year! I am somewhat of a perfectionist and I certainly struggle with trying to be perfect in everything I do. I really needed this post. I wish I could have heard you speak! 🙂

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