How Are You Prioritizing Your Marriage?
the question of ‘how are you prioritizing your marriage’ came up for us multiple times this weekend. i am sharing this with you because it’s important to me that this blog depicts the highs and lows of what marriage can go through and what to do about it.
the previous week, my husband was supposed to travel from monday and come back wednesday. thanks to chicago’s ridiculous weather, he sat on a plane for three hours before his flight (and 80 others) were eventually cancelled. he finally made it home thursday evening – thank goodness because i really needed him to massage my swollen feet and get my water bottle that was 7ft away.
on friday, he worked with a client for a full day training (home at 7:30pm) and my bedtime is now truly about 9pm since i now wake up between 2-3am consistently. we had a friend invite us out to dinner but explained that we needed time together and about my new bedtime. we took a pass.
oh and remember how ravery is training for an ironman? for those that aren’t familiar – it’s extreme. you swim 2.4 miles, then bike ride for 112 miles followed by a full marathon (26.2 miles). i know – insane and impressive.
i share this with you because his workouts for training are currently taking him 5-8 hours. that’s not a typo – hours. our saturday was spent with him riding 100 miles (crazy proud of him), which took about 8 hours and then we went to postpartum success class at the birth center for most of the afternoon. we totally sat in the back so that he could eat 2 pieces of pizza, a PB&J sandwich and a bagel. he literally burned over 7,000 calories during his workout!
he was exhausted from his extreme workout and i was exhausted from growing a human. we went to bed early but neither of us felt like we had spent much quality time together that day.
sunday wasn’t much better. i was out the door at 4:30am to drive to boulder for a photoshoot. i am super excited to share the photos with you because i helped out a henna artist/photographer in search of pregnant ladies. check!
as i returned home, ravery was headed out the door for his 2.4 mile swim and 18 mile run (!). he made it home just in time for us to head out the door to our hypnobabies childbirth class, which is great but lasts for 4 hours.
we were supposed to come home and have a skype-dinner-date with our bestest newlywed friends who just got back from their honeymoon in greece and croatia. we had been looking forward to catching up with them and hearing their adventures but my husband and i were also starting to feel a bit disconnected. he travels again for most of this week and neither of us felt like we had spent adequate, quality time together.
so how did we choose to make our marriage a priority? we asked our dear friends if we could reschedule that we could spend the last 3 hours of our sunday night together, just the two of us. we are grateful to have amazing friends who understood and fully supported our desire to take the time we needed – thank you alison and matt! surround yourself and your marriage with people who understand and value what you value.
if neither of us communicated how we were starting to feel disconnected, nothing would have changed. if neither of us valued the importance of uninterrupted, quality time between the two of us, our marriage would be in trouble.
we spent last evening taking a sunset walk and talking about how excited we are to be where we are in our lives together.
we realize it’s going to be even crazier when we welcome our newborn to our pack so we are creating behaviors now to set us up for success. i would encourage you to do the same.
what can you change or shift around so that you both choosing to make your marriage a priority?
life is bound to get crazier so it is up to both of us and each of you to choose to make your relationship a priority!