The Pursuit of Capabilities Isn’t Supposed to be Comfortable

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i just got back from a run. i’m not a marathon runner. i don’t experience the runner’s high that makes me want to run for 10 more miles. in fact, i sort of hate it. this run was particularly terrible since i got out of the workout routine for two weeks while we were holding monkeys in thailand.

 

it was also terrible because suddenly portland decided to turn into the ‘windy city’ and blow leaves and broken cigarettes in my eyes in addition to making it hard to breathe and my ears hurt. wind is my least favorite common weather thing. i hope your listening wind…least favorite.

 

anyways. there i am huffing and puffing trying to run against the wind with my lungs burning and my eyes filling with tears when i suddenly saw the bridges start to raise. this was a perfect excuse to cut out a mile from my run (i usually try to do 3 miles) since i would have to stand around and wait for the bridge to lower so i could cross to the other side of the river to my typical 3 mile loop.

wife blog running portland bridgei then had a realization…running is probably never going to be comfortable for me. it’s just not. i do it anyways because it helps my mental health once it’s done, it helps my metabolism so i can eat more cookies and it helps my heart and muscles so i can stay healthy.

 

as i was standing and contemplating turning around because i was so over it all, i thought back to when i could barely run a .5 mile. as i slowly added miles to that, i found that i was capable of running farther than i once thought (i maxed out at 7 miles and that still blows my damn mind). it was never comfortable (and still isn’t) but the point isn’t for it to be comfortable. the point is to move forward.

 

this is directly relating to where i am at with many things in my life at this exact moment.

Like running,new paths and hard work

i am struggling with the new path that i’m on from social worker to entrepreneur. all of this is brand new to me and while i have a long list of things i am supposed to be doing to advance ‘the new wifestyle’ and the business i own with my husband, i often become overwhelmed by them because they are new and extremely uncomfortable to me.

 

ready for this to become full circle…

 

new paths and new goals aren’t supposed to be comfortable because they are new and scary. we are trying to find out new capabilities of ourselves. just like running, they are supposed to move us forward, not necessarily make us feel comfortable.

 

i have to get comfortable with expecting discomfort and doing things anyways. that is a hard sentence for me to even write because as humans, we crave comfort. we work for it. we reach a point to where we are comfortable and it is incredibly hard to give that up to get up and put yourself in discomfort.

 

i miss the stability of a consistent paycheck and someone else paying my insurance. it is so much easier to have someone else telling you what to do and working with a team of people to accomplish tasks. i miss the comfort of knowing i only have to work 9am-5pm and then be done.

 

i also realize that i am picking and choosing some of what i remember as well. my consistent paycheck might have been consistent but even if i worked harder, i couldn’t make more money. i sometimes long for the days of the security of what working for someone else provides you and quickly forget that i was laid-off without a moment’s notice. there isn’t security there either.

 

so i ran on. i stopped frequently and cursed the wind but i reminded myself that i wasn’t running to be comfortable.

 

i was running to move forward.

portland water front

fine, i took this picture on monday hence the clouds but i was too busy running to take photos from the other side of the water today

there is a “look both ways” sign on the ground before you start to run/bike/walk on the hawthorne bridge, which i found fitting.

wife blog running portland inspirationso i’m going to take the anecdote from monday about motivation never striking until you start, paired with realizing i will not be comfortable in this process and start moving forward. deep breaths and boldness…

 

questions:
1) what do you think about the concept of not being comfortable in many of the things we do?
2) how do you think being comfortable holds people back?
3) any epiphanies you’ve had lately you want to share? big fan of relating and hearing what you’re going through 🙂

9 Comments

  1. Brittany

    September 11, 2014 at 1:41 pm

    1. This is great. I mean, not great that we’re not comfortable, but the realization that being uncomfortable is necessary to move forward. I realized this a few years ago when I lost one of my best friends unexpectedly. It made me realize that life is short (could I be more cliche?) and that in order to get anything done in that short life we need to just DO something. Even if its scary. Like going to a new fitness class at the gym, or leaving a stable job for something unstable and scary and unpredictable.
    2. I’m going to roundabout answer this one. I have hated both of the jobs I’ve had since graduating college. HATED. The first job made me so miserable and when my boyfriend moved away I was the most unhappy. But there was really nothing keeping me at that job in that location, because it was just TERRIBLE.
    So in that respect, I’m pretty glad I wasn’t comfortable. Because then I may not have made this move to be with my man. Or at least not so quickly.
    3. Continuing on the last thought. My job is awful, soul sucking, miserable, waste of time. They pay me though, which is nice. But I can’t see myself in 10 years, or even 5. I can’t see myself sitting at a desk for hours a day or even working for someone else on their terms. I’ve recently been looking more and more into real estate investing (house flipping, landlord, that sort of stuff) and I’m going to do it. Look, I said “I’m going to” not “Someday I’ll do it” or “I might do it” I will. I’ve been saying for a long time that I want to flip houses “once I’ve built the capital”. This was probably just an excuse or a fear. Ok, it was. But I know what I want and I am learning how to get there. Starting not next year, but starting today (okay, technically it started like a month ago but today had a better effect). Anyway, I don’t really have a concluding statement to finish this. Just… get me out of this cubicle like now. Thank you please.
    Brittany recently posted…Just Google It.

    • chelsea

      September 11, 2014 at 5:48 pm

      thanks for your comment brittany and i am so sorry to hear you lost your best friend- cannot imagine. you are so right that life is short and that does indeed mean we have to do this, even if they are scary!

      i am glad you were so uncomfortable in your job so you did make the move to be with your man but crappy that it was so terrible. yay love and boooo still being a job that is sucking your soul! you only have one soul lady so i’m glad you are taking steps TODAY (and this whole month) to get yourself out of that miserable cubicle.

      i am SO pumped for you! you can do this and you are doing this and it’s uncomfortable but you (we 🙂 ) are doing this. you got this brittany!
      chelsea recently posted…The Pursuit of Capabilities Isn’t Supposed to be Comfortable

  2. Lindsay @ The Wife in Training

    September 11, 2014 at 1:56 pm

    Great post. You’re absolutely right, humans don’t like change, though I fully believe that nothing worth doing comes easily. It’s so easy to fall into complacency and label that comfort as happiness – it’s scary, actually. Because then you might not ever end up doing anything truly exciting or new! Go, girl. You’re inspiring and impressive and you’ve got a loyal Texan pullin’ for you. 🙂

    • chelsea

      September 11, 2014 at 5:52 pm

      excellent belief that i also hold to be true (even if i conveniently forget it) that nobody said it’d be easy, only that it’s worth it. good call lindsay! you totally hit the nail on the head about mislabeling too-that’s what i’ve been doing!

      thanks for your support lindsay and as someone who is married to a texan…i know that loyalty isn’t something to mess around with 🙂

  3. Jennifer Haston

    September 11, 2014 at 2:56 pm

    i then had a realization…running is probably never going to be comfortable for me. it’s just not. i do it anyways because it helps my mental health once it’s done, it helps my metabolism so i can eat more cookies and it helps my heart and muscles so i can stay healthy.

    This is my favourite line. I can’t say I enjoy running but I like that it allows me to lose weight and to eat cookies. always with the cookies. I am really proud of you Chelsea, pursuit of a goal is tough. One baby step at a time, will give you wings. Just like you mention the time you couldn’t even do .5 miles.. now you are up to 3.. There was a time I didn’t work out at all and now I work out three times a week. I will eventually run a marathon but that is a galaxy away. I have a 5K on 9/21/2014 so that helps me stay motivated. There was also a time I had never done a 5K, now I have done 3. baby steps, baby steps..

    questions:
    1) what do you think about the concept of not being comfortable in many of the things we do? Ay carumba, it’s hard. I want to be perfect NOW. I want to know NOW. Patience is a virtue I am actively pursuing.
    2) how do you think being comfortable holds people back? If you are comfortable, you don’t grow. I think it also has to do with fear of change.
    3) any epiphanies you’ve had lately you want to share? big fan of relating and hearing what you’re going through 🙂 Asking myself when frustrated, will this matter an hour, a week, or a month from now? Usually the answer is no so I let it go now. If the answer is yes, I pursue it further.

    Keep up the awesome posts, Chelsea, I felt like I was running on Hawthorne bridge with you!
    Jennifer Haston recently posted…Don’t be afraid to ask questions. Really, you may be the only one brave enough to ask.

    • chelsea

      September 11, 2014 at 5:57 pm

      thanks for your support and encouragement jennifer and kudos to you running three 5ks! also very impressed that you have a goal of running a marathon-super impressive and keep on with those baby steps!

      love what you said about “actively pursuing” being patient, we do have to be active and intentional about things and i’m glad you are.

      thanks for your recent epiphany too, i absolutely need to ask myself that because when i’m stressed (which is frequent) i tend to really get riled up which is a waste of energy and usually hurtful to those around me! good work on deciphering that.

      made me smile thinking about running on the hawthorne bridge with you!

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