Married Life Chats: Volume III

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what better way to kick off a monday than sharing some of the ridiculous married life chats that occur between my husband and myself…

Married Life Chats

driving home after sitting in the waiting room hearing the dentist drill and then do surgery on my husband’s mouth:
me: i almost had to go sit in the car because the sound of all the work being done on you was so intense and almost nauseating.
him: *hard glare with a hand gesture since mouth was numb*

him: i am watching this magician to get branding ideas.
me: *uncontrollable laughter*

him: so do i get a cut since i referred a client to you?
me: no. you get to see me naked.
him: deal! that’s way better.

him: ugh i’m so over eating milkshakes and mac-n-cheese! i just want real food again!
me: i am walking away from you right now because all i want are milkshakes and cheese anything but my body rejects it so i’m rejecting you saying that!
him: wait, can you hand me the ice cream before you go?

me: we have to celebrate launching The Map to Dreaming Big!
him: okay, what should we do?
me: well i’m going to have a glass of wine and you can have your Ensure while we play backgammon. OMG. you’re 87 and i’m your hot, young woman!
him: i want to hate the Ensure but it’s actually really good. okay set up the board, my hot, young thaaang!

me: since your surgery a week ago, you’ve eaten 7 boxes of kraft mac-n-cheese.
him: ew. i don’t think i’ll ever be able to eat another bite again.
me: good. then my plan worked…

leaving a building to walk to our car
him: umm, where are you going?
me: to the car…
him: please never go anywhere without GPS or me.

him: do you want to go to a comedy show with our friends?
me: absolutely! when is it?
him: friday…but it doesn’t start until 10pm
me: oh. nevermind. i’ll be asleep.
him: how old are you again? 28, right? ACT LIKE IT.
me: fine. but i’m laying out my PJs and brushing my teeth before we leave…

amanda @ ‘knock on wood’ does these series twice a month so get in on it! here’s volume I and volume II just in case you are really bored at work right now.

i know you’reΒ having ridiculous conversations with your boo-thing so please share them!

ps. i want so badly not to play into the stereotype that women aren’t good with directions, but seriously…i’m the worst.

14 Comments

  1. Shelby

    March 30, 2015 at 7:16 am

    Me: I’m just so sick of wearing clothes; they’re all so uncomfortable! *frustratingly tears off all clothes and gets in bed… at 5:30pm*
    Dan: Weren’t we going to pick up dinner?
    Me: Ya…
    Dan: Well you don’t have pants on now…or a shirt
    Me: DANG IT! Why didn’t you tell me sooner?! …Just go without me…

    Being married is literally just the best in the world.
    Shelby recently posted…Another NOT SPRING Weekend

    • chelsea

      March 30, 2015 at 8:03 am

      hahah that is a hilarious scenario, shelby! clothes are really uncomfortable and i’m of the believe that once they are on they stay on or once they are off they stay off. hope he got you some good dinner πŸ™‚

  2. Amanda

    March 30, 2015 at 8:05 am

    OMG I never go out if an event STARTS at 10 either, unless I’m able to plan a nap beforehand. That is so late! Haha, I’m just as old at heart as you.
    Amanda recently posted…Taste Test Time for the Kitties

    • chelsea

      March 30, 2015 at 9:23 am

      me neither, amanda! my jaw literally dropped. that’s honestly when i’m in bed but it was actually really fun and i’m glad we went! of course i was exhausted all day saturday because ya know..old hearts.

  3. Rachel G

    March 30, 2015 at 3:39 pm

    Well I’m 23 and I am basically always asleep by 10. It’s not a bad way to live.
    Strangely, after reading all this, I’m craving some boxed mac-n-cheese.

    We had a funny conversation this week about whether Angel ‘could have been’ a professional soccer player…it may have to be a part of ‘Angelisms’ sometime.
    Rachel G recently posted…Things We See, Part 2

    • chelsea

      March 30, 2015 at 6:28 pm

      totally agree that being in bed by 10pm is not a bad thing. i felt like i wasted have my day trying to recover after that night (and i only had 1 drink so i can’t blame that).

      oh yes please expand on this ‘angelism’ soon, rachel!

  4. Lindsay

    March 30, 2015 at 6:44 pm

    Oh my gosh y’all are adorable.
    Lindsay recently posted…In a Mountain State of Mind

    • chelsea

      March 31, 2015 at 2:11 pm

      haaaa. we have our moments πŸ™‚

  5. Audrey

    March 31, 2015 at 5:49 am

    Who could get sick of milkshakes??! These are hilarious πŸ˜€ And I am most definitely a member of the 10pm-or-Earlier-Bedtime club!
    Audrey recently posted…Happy Holy Week!

    • chelsea

      March 31, 2015 at 2:12 pm

      i know! he should be thankful he can digest dairy and eat them alllll the time! good, we can be co-presidents of the club audrey!

  6. Melissa Camacho

    March 31, 2015 at 5:57 am

    hahahaha I’m dying!!! but I’m curious, has he had more Mac n cheese since then?? Josh always says he’s hoping to stop buying it but it always ends up back in the pantry. ugh I can’t stand it. lol!! y’all are seriously so funny.
    Melissa Camacho recently posted…Training Made Easy with Orijen Treats

    • chelsea

      March 31, 2015 at 2:13 pm

      haha so far…no more mac-n-cheese has been consumed but i’m holding out too to see if it sticks!

  7. Amanda Wood

    April 1, 2015 at 8:22 am

    BAHAHAHA I love that you guys play backgammon too! And 10pm is so late!
    Amanda Wood recently posted…Reality Check