3 Things I Will Never Blog About
blogging is sure an interesting thing, isn’t it? i’m sure you read different blogs for different reasons but at the core, it is because you like something about the writer – or at least that is why i read blogs! some blogs revolve around fashion, vegan recipes, or how children simultaneously make you clinically insane and capture a piece of your heart like no other (i’m looking at you, mommy bloggers).
over here at the new wifestyle, you may have noticed i mainly blog about empowering ourselves and my relationship as it evolves as a non-religious, feminist and hilarious partner. in connecting with other bloggers and even people that i can poke across the table (that means in real life), i frequently get asked “how are you so open about what goes on in your relationship?!”
i am going to let you in on a little secret and don’t be mad but…i share about 23% of my life here. i try to balance that 23% with content that is authentic, beneficial and relatable. the rest of my life typically consists of running our business and side projects, taking pictures of our dog that only my husband can truly appreciate, playing types of games common in retirement centers and dancing around the living room. oh and taxes.
my point in this and really all of blogging is that the writers get to be selective about what we share – that’s the point! i try to give you the better parts of my life because i know you don’t care what i eat for lunch every day or my fitness routine (which hasn’t been much lately). you are spending your most precious resource of time when you read what i write so i do my best to provide thought-provoking and entertaining content!
that being said, there are three things that i will never blog about and they are as follows…
1) marital conflict that hasn’t been resolved
this is a big one and something that i hold very close to me. it’s important to always put the relationship i have with my husband first and this plays into it. yes, i typically share about some of the issues we have encountered but not until we are both at a good place with them. some of these instances can be found here, here and here.
we have our arguments, disagreements and fights about who ate the last of the sunchips (me) like any other normal couple. that being said, i will never use my website as a place to throw the man i love the most under the bus. that’s not a healthy relationship, folks and plus – being hit by a bus can really mess up a pretty face.
2) sharing my husband’s view point without him reviewing it
believe it or not, any time i share our “married-life chats,” i always run it by my husband to make sure he is comfortable with me sharing what he said. now don’t get this confused, i don’t ask him permission anytime i talk about anything in our lives but i do want him to feel like he’s accurately represented. a lot of conversation and revisions went into the posts “when your spouse changes dreams because of you” and “how my anxiety is affecting our marriage” so that he felt i was accurately representing his side of the story too.
3) sex.
for starters, my family reads my blog – like every single post (isn’t that so sweet and supportive) but in no way, shape, or form do i want to share about my sex life with them. for seconds, i don’t want to talk about my sex life on the internet because i find that weird and not for me. really, i don’t want to talk about my personal sex life with anyone except my husband and my closest best friends when we are drinking cocktails and eating snacks. i may talk about it in a general manner like “ways to be intimate without having sex” but i’m not giving you the nitty gritty, you will have to find that somewhere else.
so there you have it, 3 things i will never blog about at the new wifestyle! good thing that still leaves a plethora of other topics. oh and in case you were wondering, i am going to have a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for lunch, just like a nine year old.
ps. remember that i am doing “tell me something good fridays” so be on the look out for goodness in the world!
Audrey
January 20, 2016 at 9:02 am
It’s good to have off-limit topics 🙂 I think it keeps you honest and happy and sane. I agree with your no-no topics. When I’m upset I tend to type or write, but it’s important to keep those hotheaded angry words out of the permanent internet trap. I like your restrictions 🙂
Audrey recently posted…A Personality Test (& a give away)
chelsea
January 20, 2016 at 9:11 am
i agree audrey otherwise i could get real crazy over here 🙂 i’m with you on needing to write out my feelings to process them when upset or angry but double agree that those don’t need to be shared on the permanent internet….!
Your Partner in Passion Kaot
January 20, 2016 at 9:19 am
Good thing you have me for #3!!!!!! Tehehehehe
Also I TOTALLY agree with 1 and 2, 1 for any conflict that hasn’t been resolved. And if I discuss the my sex life more specifically/in more details, I run it by the beau. It’s his Sex life too, after all.
❤️❤️❤️
chelsea
January 20, 2016 at 9:22 am
too right you are, kait 🙂 good point in it’s his sex life too!
Angelica Wedell
January 20, 2016 at 9:56 am
Words to live by! I think this applies outside of blogs too. Any time we talk about our spouses (at the office, with friends, online, etc.) we are representing them and our relationship. Thanks for sharing 🙂
chelsea
January 20, 2016 at 3:05 pm
ohhh good point to do this outside of online world too, angelica! you’re good 🙂 we totally are representing ourselves and our partners when we speak about them!
Elyse
January 20, 2016 at 10:37 am
I totally agree with your off-limit topics! I think it’s necessary with this share-happy world we live in. Keeps things honest and certain things sacred.
Elyse recently posted…National Popcorn Day
chelsea
January 20, 2016 at 3:06 pm
oh and it is indeed a share-happy world, elyse! it helps to set boundaries for us both so we know what we approve and don’t approve to be shared!
chelsea recently posted…3 Things I Will Never Blog About
Hana Bilqisthi
January 20, 2016 at 10:49 am
Thank you for your post! Now I learn about what not to share in blog post if I married! 😀
chelsea
January 20, 2016 at 3:06 pm
thank you for reading and for you comment, hana! hope it helps, it’s been good for our marriage for sure!
Kate
January 20, 2016 at 1:19 pm
I totally understand a lot of these–there is such a thing as oversharing! Also, no judgement here on your lunch choices. I eat peanut butter toast with bananas almost every day for lunch.
Kate recently posted…A Power Couple’s Birth Plan
chelsea
January 20, 2016 at 3:09 pm
oh so glad i’m not alone in that PB feast YUM! it was delicious. totally right, there is such a thing as oversharing and i try to keep that to a minimum at least in terms of my marriage!
Amberly
January 20, 2016 at 3:19 pm
I especially love #1!!! I sometimes share resolved conflicts and what we learned from them, but definitely not in the midst of them!
Amberly recently posted…A Current Marriage “Trend” That is Negatively Affecting Millennials
chelsea
January 21, 2016 at 8:24 am
i think there is definitely power in sharing what we have learned from conflicts but yes, so not until it’s resolved and has a little time behind it!
Christine
January 20, 2016 at 5:46 pm
So much yes to #1 and #2! #3 doesn’t bother me as much, but I have never felt drawn to blog about it either.
Christine recently posted…What to Pin and When for the Best Results on Pinterest
chelsea
January 21, 2016 at 8:25 am
glad you agree, christine! 🙂
Vivien
January 22, 2016 at 1:17 pm
Thank you for the list Chelsea! I agree there are some things that are definitely off limits (or deserve a review) before blogging or even talking about in public. Reminds me a lot of the advice my mom gave me (that boils down to) “praise in public, criticize in private.”
Vivien recently posted…Why I Almost Vowed to Never Enter a Tall Tales Contest
chelsea
January 25, 2016 at 9:25 am
your mom is a smart woman, vivien! i like what she said about praising in public and criticizing in private. thanks for sharing that!
Erin @ Very Erin
January 22, 2016 at 4:35 pm
Topics that should definitely be off-limits! I am infinitely bothered by people who post online about on-going conflicts, hoping people will “take their side”. That’s silly though. There aren’t sides. Dave and I are on the same side. And no one else needs to be invited to join our arguments!
chelsea
January 25, 2016 at 9:26 am
i agree, erin! it’s awkward to witness this public weirdness. love what you said about you and dave being on the same side 🙂
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